Happy actually Christmas

I'm still aglow. (And I have the Sarah Harmer song of the same name running in my head on repeat.) Just so you all have the right picture in your head about all of this, our correspondence is silly and not about much of anything, just fun. I've stopped trying to craft witty multi-layered emails, as is my usual wont. Instead, they are just plain silly and it is liberating!

My sister went out for a run, so our Christmas day progression has stalled out. I hope that she isn't totally thoughtless and runs for hours as is HER wont. I think this happened last year too.... With the brother not here this year, it matters less--we are off our ritual as it is--but still. It leaves the rest of us hanging around waiting. I am trying to DO things (hence the blog) rather than just wait and feel put upon. God only knows that I have things I should be doing, and it is not like I am 5 years old and desperate to open presents!

I am aglow

He wrote me. I'm smiling.

Happy almost Christmas

Greetings from NYC! It is sort of nice to be home--I think I am finally able to let down a little. I have taken naps both days I have been here. I have also been manically shopping...for myself. The presents were bought a long time ago. I now have the core of a DC-appropriate wardrobe. Most notably, Banana Republic has started making women's blouses in three cuts, one of which has ample enough breast tailoring so that I can find a shirt that doesn't gape and isn't a tent! Very exciting.

On the front that has taken up most of my attention these days, NM has me totally smitten. We talked about god, politics, and sex on our first dinner date.... I am anxious now because I haven't heard from him today--we were averaging 15 emails or so each day. But he knows I'm gone and he has a house guest, and well, we will see each other again, right? But I do look back at my last email and obsess over whether there was something obscurely wrong with it. Stop it Abby!!!!

If I were to be a little more secure that he hasn't started to hate me, I would be excited by the glimmer of hope that the idea of a relationship with someone like him offers. I am worried that we haven't progressed further physically yet, though there are perhaps practical reasons for that and there was much verbal flirting and talks of things we are going to do together in the future. But if that weren't a sign that we have no future, it might mean that we have a future very different from my previous "relationships": he stimulates my brain (and my mouth) more than pretty much anyone I've ever met. I could find myself exploring things that have sprouted in dark corners of my brain but never seen the light of someone else's interests.... And maybe, just maybe, we could find a way to meld the intellectual and physical into something pretty damn exciting. Don't know, but that is where hope is taking me today. And, god damn it, even if things don't work out with him, I think he may be raising the bar for the next poor bloke who comes along.

(please work out!)

And I did find a pair of very sexy jeans. I think he'll like them... ;)