For real

I'm really moving. I just purchased a one-way ticket to Washington, DC on November 21!

I've got a lot to do before then, and that is ignoring all the good-bye saying!

Phew

I got a voicemail from the DC job deparment chair. They will be making me an offer. Don't know what it is yet, so I still feel frustrated. But still, it is a relief.

Job hunts and dating

I am continually struck by how many parallels there are between job hunting and dating. A lot of the emotions are the same ("what if I'm not smart/pretty/skinny/accomplished/funny enough?") even if the specific adjectives are weighted differently depending if you are looking for a job or a mate.

And there seem to be similar rules that I, at least, am paranoid I am breaking without even being aware of it. The need to both signal willingness but not over-eagerness. The wierd combination of needing to put down the other party so that you accumulate more of the power, yet not actually put them down, because after all the ultimate purpose is to make a committment to the other.

And then, there is the crushing humiliation of really, really wanting the other, and having a sinking feeling that they don't want you. Sitting by the phone, hoping, wanting it to ring. But the more time passes the less likely it will.

And yet there ARE differences. So some of the instincts I have developed from dating probably aren't serving me very well in the job search. (They probably don't serve me very well dating either, but that is another story.)

I hate doing both, but I want a job and a mate, so I keep throwing myself back into the fray. Ouch.

and...

So while my little animal core is throwing a temper tantrum, I can't get any work done, which just means that I am dragging out the whole graduation waiting game thing and the tenure track application waiting game thing just a little more.

Errgh.

Okay, okay, I'll say it...

I HATE WAITING!!!!

There that feels better.

My whole life these days, weeks, months involves an enormous amount of waiting. Waiting for other people to make up their minds about MY future. It niggles.

If I understood correctly (and I think I was slightly distracted at the time so I might not have), I am/was supposed to be called yesterday afternoon or this morning with the offer for a temporary professorship at a D.C. area policy school.

No call, and it is 12:08 pacific time. So they are late.

My rational brain says, so what? They are late. People are late all the time. Particularly when a bureacratic process is involved. Just because they are late doesn't mean it is bad news. Maybe it is slow because they want to offer me more money. All sorts of good things could be happening. Who knows?

But my id, which is generally feeling very neglected these days, just lies on the floor, pounding her little fists and feet, shouting:

I HATE WAITING!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Woohoo!

I finally had an email comment published on TPM. My life is complete...

;)

Will wonders never cease?

I got an email from ET today with comments--He took the time to write more than a one liner! And I only had to leave 5 or 6 voicemail messages.

Steaming

Yesterday I bounded out of bed at 6:00 am (I love the fall time change, for that reason, even if it means it get dark earlier) and went to read the Sunday New York Times (yes, I live in LA and only read the NYT--I've been in denial for 4 years).

Imagine my shock and horror when I read this article (I don't think it is behind the timesselect wall), that is about a couple of shadowy groups, involving Bushies, the US Chamber of Commerce, and lots of Wall Street fat cat types, planning an all-out assult on Sarbanes-Oxley and other investor protection rules after the election.

Never mind that SOX WORKS and is POPULAR and that this country may well be rejecting the idiot republicans finally. None of that seems to pose a problem for these guys, because all of this burdensome regulation is harming American business' competition (read: it is getting harder for us to rape our companies for every last penny).

And they are trying to limit liability (i.e. the only leverage we the people have over these fuckers) both civil liability and criminal liability. They think the jail sentences getting handed out to their friends are too harsh (but they vote for law and order republicans who have no problem locking up and throwing away the key on young black men who commit minor drug crimes. And they vote down tax increases that would fund education and health iniatives that might possibly give those guys some other way to earn a living and salvage some dignity.)

Now the really funny thing is that a member of one of these groups paid for my dissertation...

So can you have a bigger ego?

This is from a job announcement from the business school of my alma mater. I won't use its name here, because of my google paranoia, but it is that midwestern university that has had a stranglehold on the field of economics since mid-century:

Each candidate should submit ... the names of at least two scholars qualified and willing to evalulate the candidate's ability, training, and potential for research and teaching.... We will rely heavily on the advice of established scholars whose own records of accomplishment give deserved weight to their opinions. If you feel you are qualified to become a faculty member at #$!%#, please submit an application online....

The arrogance of the ad is staggering. But perhaps honest. Makes me not want to apply, except that being at this nameless university would be fuckin' amazing, and applying increases my chances of being hired to something marginally greater than zero....

Really long time, no post

So shortly after the below post, I fell back into a depression. Not sure why, I think it was just reflexive. I've crawled back though, and spent all weekend doing administrative tasks towards applying for tenure-track positions that start in fall of '07. I'm working with a list of 28 positions, not all of which will necessarily stay on the list. But it is nice to feel like I have options. No one job has to come through.

I also broke through the psychological barrier of sending off packets to schools. I sent off three over the weekend, and while I still suspect that my papers are crap, at least I am getting used to the idea. So hopefully it will get less scary when I get around to sending them out to the heavy hitters...